Besides keeping an open heart and open mind, I've been trying to figure out this strange new place I've dropped into -- the territory called online dating.
I'm trying to operate like a local, not a tourist. I want to get the lay of the land, not have to keep guessing at a set of rules -- some of which are likely unwritten. The men seem to know the rules -- but I don't know about the women. Or maybe it's that each gender has its own set of rules but have not exchanged information.
Perhaps my profile is unclear or unhelpful. I am honest in my choices of interests, photos, and what's important to me and I don't expect to attract every man -- that would be silly. I would prefer to not waste anyone's time -- I'm looking for quality not quantity. But in the few meetings I've had so far, the men seemed to change their minds pretty quickly and not want another meeting. I accept that but am puzzled. It's like I'm still looking for the secret password.
What are these men, these hunters, after? I am so curious.
I've been on one site for six months. I noticed that most men who received a request from me to connect don't respond at all. It's neither a 'yes' nor is it a 'no'. A few do close or end the connection and I prefer that because at least I know where I stand with them. It's the ones who don't respond, (even though they are in their account almost daily) that baffle me. Does it mean they'll get to me when they get to me? They must have a lot of women in the queue to not respond for a month. How long should I leave the request for connection before closing it? I used to wait two weeks, but lately that seems hasty. What's reasonable?
I'm open to suggestions.
For the past six months, I've only been on one site -- it does take a lot of time to properly monitor a profile. But how do I know I'm on the best site for me?
After a bit of searching, I found 'the five best online dating sites for 2011', which you can link to here:
http://www.consumer-rankings.com/dating/
How many are you familiar with? I will try at least one of these other sites, in the spirit of research, and report back on my results.
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